This morning, per my typical Monday morning, I stopped at Cumberland Farms for my morning coffee. The fellow behind the counter — I’ve written about him before — was understandably disappointed. We’ve been talking about his career and things to help get him jump-started. He had been looking forward to attending our SQL Saturday this past weekend (which went very well — I’ll write more about that in a separate article), and was excited about it every time we spoke.
As it turned out, fate had other plans for him. He had a family emergency he had to address, and was unable to attend SQL Saturday. He sent me a LinkedIn message and was very apologetic. I told him, no apology necessary. Things happen. I told him this morning, “you gotta do you first.”
This is effectively true no matter what we do. Important events come up, and it’s really disappointing when you miss them. Missed opportunities are always unfortunate. But sometimes, sh*t happens. An emergency that involves you or your family always outweighs any once-in-a-lifetime opportunity that might come up. But you can always come up with opportunities. You can only live your life once.
As for my friend’s missed SQL Saturday opportunity, I told him of three more upcoming SQL Saturdays all within a three hour drive or train ride: Providence, Boston, and New York City. Although he missed this weekend’s opportunity, I passed along three more.
Generally, most of us work to live, not live to work. Careers may be important, but our selves and our family are the foundation upon which they stand. You need to take care of yourself and your family first. If something happens to you or your family, anything else is pretty much a moot point. You won’t be able to take care of anything else if you don’t do you first.